How to Find Great Antiques in Tucson, Arizona

Granted, I've never really tried to go garage sale-ing anywhere other than Tucson, but man, Tucson is incredibly hard to find good second-hand pieces. It's the unfortunate trifecta of:

1. Being a relatively new city: Although technically founded by missionaries several hundred years ago, people didn't actually live in Tucson until like the 1950's. Even then, the town didn't take off until the 80's. It's hard to have as many antiques when people had to move big, heavy furniture with them.
2. Close to the border with Mexico: If you ever garage sale in Tucson, you will run into several men with old pick-up trucks who go from sale to sale and fill up their trucks with basically whatever they can find. At the end of the day, they head back across the border with their scores. You need to beat these guys to sales if you want a shot at true treasure-hunting.
3. Snowbirds: Most snowbirds are people from northern, cold states that choose to spend their winters here. When you have two homes and only lives in Tucson for six months out of the year, odds are your winter home isn't where you keep your best stuff.

Since Tucson has more idiosyncrasies than most for antiquing, here are my best tips for great finds in 'odd' places.

Garage and Estate Sales:
1. Have a list
Garage sale-ing can be incredibly over-whelming. There are tables of random crap in front of random houses full of random strangers (most likely). Make the process less anxiety-filled by having goals. Have a well-curated list of things you're actively looking for and don't waste your time on anything else. My list is usually fisherman's orbs (those green glass orb things), custom and unique artwork, and anything authentically Art Deco. And if the garage sale doesn't have anything on your list, feel no guilt about wasting no more time there. Seriously, we do a lot of drive-bys where we slowly drive passed, scope the goods, and not even stop. No guilt at all. Secondly, once you have am established list, it makes it easier to target the appropriate types of sales. You'll have better luck for bigger items at moving sales and estate sales than garage sales. Garage sales are great for smaller, niche items, like vintage video games.

Original Post: 'How to Clean an Old Jug'

2. Do your research
One thing that happens when you garage sale A LOT is you start to learn tricks to make it easier on yourself. Over the past five years, I've determined one of the easiest ways to find treasure is to do your research beforehand. Every once in a while, we'll just drive around on a Saturday morning chasing arrows drawn on the side of cardboard boxes, but the odds of success are much lower. The best insurance for finding good pieces is to know how to hunt before ever leaving your home. First, know your town. Know which neighborhoods are more likely to have the type of stuff you're looking for. Second, hop on Craigslist and start evaluating sales. My favorites are always estate sales, but I'll also keep an eye out for well-organized garage sales. I don't waste my time on people who are trying to make some cash off a bunch of bits and bobs they should have just donated to Goodwill. Lastly, the more pictures the better.

Original Post: 'Project House Update: Carpet, The Devil Inside Part II'

3. Become familiar with estate sale companies in your area
Here's a tip that will make your life loads easier: know the estate sale companies in your area. Estate sales are a perfect storm for finding great pieces. First, it's usually full houses of antiques to poke through. Second, the quality of pieces are much better since (as morbid as it sounds) it's not people getting rid of their stuff. They just can't take it with them. Third, companies don't have personal attachment to the pieces they're selling, so prices are more reasonable. I have a company in Tucson I prefer, so I'll check their website on Friday night to see where they'll be Saturday morning and if there's any pieces worth waking up for.

Original Post: 'Project House Update: Carpet, The Devil Inside Part II'

Antiques Fairs and Markets:
1. Go regularly
Get to know vendors and keep an eye out for pieces on your wishlist. If it's there two months in a row, you can probably get a good deal on it. That's how I got my beautiful arch lamp. After eyeing it at the Antiques fair and seeing it still there a month later, we talked them down to less than half of what it was originally priced. Winner winner. Additionally, if you get to know some of the regular vendors, they can keep an eye out for pieces that are harder to find. They see a lot of inventory and if you give them some contact info, they probably have better connections to those hard-to-find gems.

Original Post: 'I Love Lamp'

2. Go early, or late
If you want some of the most and amazing pieces, go early. How sad would I have been if this Unicorn mirror had slipped through my fingers? The best pieces sell quickly, but no one wants to pack their trailer back up. Once vendors start packing up their booths, which is often earlier than you expect, you can strike up some great deals. Prey on their laziness.

Original Post: 'Hunting Antiques'

3. Take your time
Antiques fairs are the opposite of garage sales. These booths are full of items that are well-loved and well-curated. The percentage of crap to gems is sooooo much better than garage sales. Because the odds are more in your favor, take your sweet time. The best little gems, like my bird sconce, are not always as obvious as they should be. Get your hunt on!

Original Post: 'Project House Update: The Birds and the Beach'

Some Overall Tips:
1. Understand your skill set
It's incredibly easy to see a piece and it's potential, yet have no realistic way to get there. For me, my skills of transformation are limited, at best. I can paint something or scrub it clean, but that's about it. Dan's got more skills, like rewiring and rebuilding, but over the years, we've learned to stay away from big projects, like resurfacing and reupholstering. Pass on pieces that are too much work for you or include the cost of hiring professionals in determining the value of the deal.

Original Posts: 'It's a Ridiculously Small World After All' & 'Project House Update: Prepping and Polishing'

2. A great deal is only 'great' if you actually have a use for it
We've gotten pretty lucky and found uses and homes for every deal we couldn't pass up. However, a mid-century modern dresser did live in the middle of our entryway way longer than it should have. I have friends who haven't been so lucky, especially if you aren't in a 'permanent' housing situation.

Original Post: 'And So the Craziness Begins'

3. Understand how the calendar affects sales
Garage sales and antiques fairs always suck more when the weather is bad. People don't want to move big, heavy items around when it's hot or potentially rainy. In Tucson, that means the summer when it's possible to cook yourself on the sidewalk. In college town, you can get some great finds at semester ends (December and May) when people move out of dorms and apartments. And since many antiques fair vendors are snowbirds, the fairs are at their peak when they're back in town.

That's it. That's all I got. I've found some great pieces that I absolutely love, therefore, I'm clearly an expert in this. And if you want more info on a city or town near you, go check out this post from Invaluable. So, go forth and find that catch your life needs!

How to Survive Zumba License Class

Have you ever had little happy accidents happen slowly over time and then suddenly it's a year later and you look back and say to yourself, "How the hell am I now a licensed Zumba instructor?!"

No? Just me? Ok, let me tell you a story.

About a year ago, I got up the courage to start taking free Zumba classes that were offered by the campus I work on. I instantly fell in love with the class and it became part of my weekly routine.

After about six months of consistently attending Zumba twice a week, I was getting pretty good. I was making friends and having fun and getting better. At this time, the guy who organizes all the exercise classes for the campus came to me with an idea. Would I ever consider becoming Zumba certified so I could substitute teach my class? The campus would pay for my license classes and I would be an official Zumba instructor.

And because I am a crazy person, I said yes almost instantaneously.

Now, if you don't know me in real life, you would not look at me and go, 'Oh hey. She looks like a Zumba instructor." I can be clumsy and spazzy and not-at-all graceful. So why would I think I could be a Zumba instructor? Because why the hell not? What's the worst that could happen?

And then the coordinator came back to me and told me there was a license class in four weeks. Four weeks is absolutely no time what so ever when you're facing an eight hour Zumba license class. I was in nowhere near good enough shape to survive an eight hour class.

So I dropped the hammer. I got a temporary gym membership. I started running again. I checked out zumba DVDs from the library. I pushed myself. And when the time came to sign up for the class, I chickened out. Even after all my work, I didn't feel ready. I didn't feel like I was 'good enough' to be a Zumba instructor.

The coordinator was really supportive about it and we committed to talking about it again in the spring. I told myself that I would keep my training up and by that time, I knew I would be ready.

But Thanksgiving happened and the holidays happened and when he brought the class back up in late January, I was probably in worse shape, not better. I wasn't in a better place about it and while I wanted to be a Zumba instructor, I didn't know if I could do it.

The difference this time turned out to be my Zumba instructor. Before, I didn't know what the license class was. All I knew was that it was an eight hour class to license you. It sounded absolutely terrifying. However, after a long talk with my instructor, it turns out that I way overbuilt it in my head. I was stressing myself out over nothing.

With a new sense of clarity, I signed up and I did it. I am now a licensed Zumba instructor. It wasn't anything like I originally thought it would be.And because I originally had no idea what to expect, I thought I would outline my experience to calm the fears of anyone else considering getting their license.

• You cannot fail. Let me repeated this again so you fully understand. You cannot fail the Zumba license class. There is no test or assessment or anything. If you pay the money, show up, and stick out the full eight hours, you will receive your Zumba license. The way it was explained to me was that the license showed that you were taught, it does not guarantee you a teaching position. You still have to prove to whoever is hiring you to teach a class that you are good enough to teach.  But for me, I didn't care about that part. I already knew that I had someone who wanted me to teach, I just needed the piece of paper. I just needed to survive the class.
• It will be a large class. My Zumba class can flucuate with somewhere between four to twenty people and since we practice in a room that used to be a cafeteria, there's plenty of space for everyone. The Zumba license class was huge! It had to be close to sixty people in a regular-sized dance studio. As you can see below, the room was packed. While it was a different experience from what I'm used to, having to be incredibly mindful of the choreography so I didn't spin into someone, the plus side was the it was fairly easy to hide. It was easy to blend in and not participate if you don't want to. The teacher encourages energy and bravery as qualities that make a good instructor, but if that's not your speed yet, that's perfectly ok. 

• It will be a long class. When you sign up, they tell you it's an eight hour day. And while it is a very long day, it is definitely survivable with how they break it down. The first hour to 90 minutes is a full Zumba class. It will be the perfect example of a class they will teach you in the remaining seven hours. After the workout, you'll sit down and they'll give you an overview of what Zumba actually is. From there, the teacher breaks down the four different styles of dance that are at the core of Zumba. They'll go through one, break for lunch, and teach the remaining three after lunch. Each dance will be shown by the basic steps and there will be some actives to teach it. At the end of the day, it was the most sore I've been in a very long time, but at no point during the day did I feel like I was going to die. Just know your body and pace yourself. No one will push you harder than you push yourself. It's ok to take things slow. 

• Beware the pressures of ZIN. After breaking for lunch, the teacher will go into their schpeel about ZIN: the Zumba Instructors Network. It's a $35 a month subscription service that gives you music, choreography, DVDs, and other perks. They will push you very hard to join, but the thing to remember is that, in the USA, you do not need to be a ZIN member to be a Zumba instructor. The wording they use implies that you need to sign up, but it's not true. If you're playing on teaching at a gym and running several classes a week, it's probably a good deal, but for me, it clearly wasn't. Since I'm going to be a sub, my choreography should be as similar as possible to the regular teacher's choreography, meaning I didn't need any new moves. The pressure is high during the class, so you should do some research beforehand to determine if it's right for you. 
• Don't be embarrassed if you aren't a good dancer. I'm not. I try really hard, but I don't pick up the moves very quickly so in a new class with a new teacher, I flail quite a bit. Don't worry about it. Everyone is concerned with themselves and won't focus on you. Just focus on yourself, too. 

• Things to bring in your gym bag:
• Drinks: a refillable water bottle, some gatorade, maybe a coconut water. My teacher didn't pause for hydration breaks like my regular teacher, so be prepared to quickly glup some H20 when you rotate to the back of the room. During sit-down breaks, I sipped coconut water, as well. 
• Snacks: trail mix and protein bars. While there is a break for lunch, you'll be working out afterward, so eat light. Don't want to get nauseous or puke it back up. Graze slowly and tell yourself you'll just gourge on the way home. 
• A big towel, to dry yourself and to sit on. You will be sweaty and you will be sitting on the floor. Two birds, one stone. {Sidenote: some people bring camping chairs to sit on during breaks, but there's an air of judgement in the room against those people. While it's completely reasonable to bring one, 'serious dancers have no problem sitting on the floor' to quote my own teacher.}
• Change of clothes. After the full workout, towel yourself dry, try to stop sweating by waiting 15 to 20 minutes, and change out of your sweaty clothes. I brought a change of clothes, but I changed too soon after the full workout and kept sweating in my clean, dry clothes. 
• Sweatshirt. Once you stop moving, keep sweating, and sit down, you'll get really cold really quickly. Layer up. 
• Tissues or toilet paper. There were sixty of use so the bathroom ran out of toilet paper almost immediately. Unless you want to use paper towels, heed my warning. 
• Business or contact cards. You'll meet a lot of people and this will make things easier. And on that note...
• Making friends is easier than you think. I thought going into it that I would be a loner and I would be 100% ok with it. However, oddly enough, because the teacher chose some of the same songs we do in class, I knew the choreography. Because of this, some of the other students started looking to me, which was incredibly odd. If I had been more social, I could have been making friends hand over fist. In hindsight, I wish I had. It was a much more supportive and friendly environment than I had prepared for. 

I didn't anticipate enjoying the class as much as I did, which is probably the reason I chickened out the first time. I was only focused on surviving, but if I had known more beforehand, I think I could have really thrived. If you choose to do it, you will be fine. And don't be like me, try to enjoy it, too. 

10 Essentials of a Lady Lair

Why it that men get man caves? Is there some twisted assumption that the women get the rest of the house? Yes, men get their own rooms with big screen TVs and pool tables while women get what...the kitchen?

Why is there no female equivalent? A space for ladies to kick back, relax, and have fun. I've only ever seen one female man cave on TV, in contrast to the dozens of the traditional variety. On 'The Cosby Show', there was an episode solely devoted to Claire getting her own 'room' (when reruns still aired before the Bill Cosby controversy). A room all to herself with a lock on the door for her own privacy. The whole episode focused on her family trying to get into the room and why would she want a room all to herself. Here's the word-for-word synopsis from IMDB:

Cliff builds a room just for Clair, her own special place for work and retreat. Everyone, except Cliff, is upset that she wants to be alone and not spend time with them. Cliff tries to explain the purpose of a special room.

At the end of the episode, the room was never mentioned again. Poof. The only instance of a female man cave was gone. I swear entire seasons of 'King of Queens' that have taken place in Doug's man cave, which no one ever questions the necessity of. Yet, the only instance of a female man cave and it only focuses on the why.

To be fair, there have been other shows that have given a woman her own space, but they all seem to be bathrooms or walk-in closets. How superficial is that? I want a space devoted to fun and unwinding, like a man cave. Sure, a spa bathroom could be fun, but I want more than that. I want a space I've deemed the 'lady lair'.

My ideal lady lair would be quite the room. It is a space where I can unwind with my girl friends. A calm, chill space where we can catch up, be ourselves, and be silly. At the same time, a place where I could crank up some terrible 80's music and dance with my cats. It doesn't have to be a space that screams "FEMININE!", but form and function can be equal. It would be Indiana Jones' library meets Emily Henderson meets 'The Mindy Project': vintage and suave, feminine and style, colorful and fun. I know that doesn't make much sense, but let me walk you through it.

1. A cozy place to relax and converse. I don't think I'd be able to keep a sofa like this one nice since I'm such a heathen, but it's just so gorgeous. This one from Joybird is a magical mix of vintage and cozy. Like something a 1940's movie star would lounge on with her romance novels after a long day of shooting elegant entrance scenes walking down giant staircases. Or, in a more practical universe, something I could sink into with my friend Bekah and gossip about how she ended up on yet another accidental date. It's a sofa that beckons me after a long, stressful day.
2. Classy shelving for books and beautiful little knick-knacks. Since my ideal relaxation space is a library, bookshelves are a must-have. This unit is way fancier than anything I would need with built-in lighting and hidden drawers, but it sure is beautiful. A nice frame to highlight the loveliness of anything special you put on it. 
3. Uplifting and inspirational art. Sometimes you just need word art to remind you that you can both be a thug and like flowers. #truth
4. A home for refreshments. I'm not a drinker, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate a bar cart, just maybe it isn't a bar anymore. It could house a crystal ice-bucket and glass-bottled sodas. Maybe a big, old-timey jar filled with goldfish crackers or jellybeans? You know, grown-up food.
5. Better lighting than over-head recessed sconces. It has been long established that I am a fan of lamps, but this one is somethin'. Oh lordy, this one. How sexy is that base? It's like a starlet at the Academy Awards; it's like a designer gown. I may now be coveting it until it goes on sale, assuming I can find another corner of the house that needs a lamp.
6. A place to perch and nibble. Sometimes when you catch up with someone, you want to be lazy and slouch on the sofa. Other times, when the conversation is fancy, you need to perch with your drinks by the bar on an elegant stool.
7. A plush rug to keep feet from getting cold. It's like art on your floor. Nice art that your friends can sit on when you've filled up the sofa. Or where you can bellyflop on tougher days. A rug like this goes a long way in making a room more cozy and snugly, especially one with a subtle floral pattern.
8. A surface for magazines, cats, and plates of cupcakes. A great coffee table doesn't have to be a star. It's like Judy Greer: an amazing, beautiful actress who's never really the star of the show, but man, does she make everything better. I think that's my new favorite analogy: this coffee table from Target is the Judy Greer of my lady lair. It's pretty and classic with some flair in the mid-century modern legs and drawers. Like something Cheryl on 'Archer' would have (I've got to get off this Judy Greer train...)
9. Something that smells better than I do. Candles are the definition of relaxing. You have to love this pretty little one from Target that not only smells deliciously fresh, but demands to you only be positive in your sacred space.
10. A cool way to play some tunes. Keeping with the subtle floral theme, how amazing is this phonograph? It's hard to imagine anything it plays sounding bad, no matter how terrible my choice in music.

All the essentials of my lady lair are like the lady lair itself: functional and luxurious. It's a space of curated pieces that speak deep to my soul. And honestly, asking for a lady lair isn't anymore ridiculous than a man asking for a man cave. Somehow, that's become a thing. It's about time we make the lady lair a thing, too.

Project House Update: The Birds and the Beach

You know how it takes me forever to finish a project? And like even longer to write about it? Well, today's your lucky day because not only did I finally get around to/finish two projects, but I'm going to brag about them now.

The first project was a shadowbox chock full of reminders from our trip to Hawaii in the summer of 2014 (see? It only took me 17 months to get around to it). The second was hanging a dove wall sconce that's probably been sitting in my closet for over three years.

I mentioned it in my list of tips for visiting Turtle Bay Resort, but we really expected to bring home a bag of shells as a souvenir. That was not the case. Every shell we found (minus a small piece of driftwood) is carefully arranged in this shadowbox. Maybe seven shells total.

Since I couldn't get as many shells as I wanted, I filled the void with beach sand. A lot of sand. This was only half of the sand. Dan's called dibs on the other half. Combine my sand, the shells, a great picture Dan took of me on the beach, and a high-quality shadowbox and you have something worthy of the term 'art'.

I say 'high-quality' shadowbox because this was not my first attempt at this project. Originally, I couldn't find a shadowbox I liked, so I bought a cheap one from Michael's and gave it a coat of paint. However, the back of it didn't seal well and I had to make a hanging mechanism because it didn't have a hook. Yeah, there was no way I trusted that on our wall. So, I found a pretty good one from Target and gave it two coats of spray paint. It even has a gasket around the end of the back to keep the sand in. Worth it.

Onto my unique choice in shelving...

Several years ago, I found this plastic dove shelf at the antique's fair. It's tied with my lamp for my favorite thing we've found out there. I didn't know what I would do with it, but it was vintage and birds and it called to me. Unfortunately, it was a gross 1970's color, but that could be easily fixed.

For a long time, I debated what color to paint it. Once I'd painted the sand shadowbox, it hit me that these might group well together so it got a matching coat of white paint. Someday I may change my mind, I could see it in an antique gold. Or a more matte white. Or even a weird painting project where I hand-paint it all the colors it should be, with brown branches and white doves with little orange beaks. If you've got ideas of your own, I've found one on etsy. It's part of a set even!

It was hard to find the right spot for them in the house, but I settled on the entryway. Here's the corner of the entryway before. It felt a little off-balance because only the left wall was decorated.

And now both walls are adorned. It felt a little awkward at first for displaying a picture of myself in a bikini in our entryway, but it's probably less creepy in the entryway than in the guest room.

I'm still styling and arranging things on the dove sconce. Since it's plastic and not even six inches in radius, I don't trust it yet to hold anything fragile or important. It hasn't earned my trust yet. We're still just acquaintances.

Six Things I Wish I'd Known about Grad School

Let me be real honest with you: my grad school experience was rough. Like, the-hardest-thing-I've-ever-done rough. Most of that was due to my own naivety. I didn't understand almost anything about it when I started and it threw me for a big old loop. I made the assumption that grad school was very similar to undergrad, which it is 100% not.

{Sidenote: Three things to note: 1) My grad school experience was engineering based. From talking with my friends from other scientific backgrounds, their experiences were fairly similar to mine, but these tips may not translate perfectly to someone pursuing an arts or business degree. Maybe they do, but I have no idea. Let me know in the comments if you have one of those backgrounds how your experience was the same/different. 2) Some of my experiences may have been school-specific. I tried to stay general, but programs do vary. 3) My grad school experience stopped at a master's degree. As tips for entering grad school, my opinions should be valid for however long your schooling goes, but grad school programs do evolve as you go for higher and higher degrees.}

• While the grading is much harder, grades are much nicer. I wish someone had told me that you basically have to be failing a class in grad school to get a 'C'. The rubric goes something like: A - has a very good understanding of the material, B - is trying really hard but missing the mark quite often, C - not getting it at all. At the same time, it is much harder to get an A. Curving grades is not only expected, but required since the average on assignments is typically around 50%. In reflecting on my time in grad school, I can only think of one instance when I got 100% on an assignment/quiz/test and I was absolutely ecstatic. To get 100% in grad school, your work has to be flawless and with anywhere between 2-4 classes and whatever else is on your plate, flawless just ain't gonna happen. What this all boils down to: grades aren't the measurement of success they were in undergrad. I felt like I was failing every day, but my final grades never reflected that. As long as you are showing up and giving it your all, your grades won't be as bad as you think they should be. Hell, after my first semester, I didn't even check my grades anymore. I assumed if I was failing a class, the college would let me know. 
• There are many different ways to earn a degree. My college had three different ways to earn an MS. The first way was the research path. This is the path you would choose if you were interested in continuing on with a PhD. You take a fair amount of coursework, but in addition, you take a semester or two of pure research where you work on (and may even get paid) a project for a professor (your advisor) and write a thesis on it. This is like PhD program 'lite'. The second path involves taking only coursework. This path is great if you already have a job and want to get a degree in tandem. You'll probably only have the time to take one or two courses a semester, so it may take a couple more years to earn your degree. The third way is a combination of the two which involves mainly coursework with a final 'report' for a smaller project you work with a professor. This a great path for people who want to do research, but don't want to continue with a PhD. It's important to fully understand the ways you can earn a degree because often you cannot change your path once you have started. For my college, you couldn't be a teaching assistant, grader, or researcher if you were doing purely coursework. Basically, you can only do the coursework path if you have a source of income outside the university, a fact a friend of mine didn't know and got her royally screwed over late in her degree process. In other words: understand the strings attached to the money the university provides you. {Also, from here on out, my points relate more to the research paths.}
• Choosing the right advisor is just as important as choosing the right school. When I applied for grad school, I truly didn't understand how much of my fate was tied to the professor I would be working with. At my first campus visit, I thought I was considering the school, not that the professors were considering me. Needless to say, I didn't get any research invitations from professors at that first school. While the school name on your diploma will probably have the most effect on your future opportunities, your advisor will affect almost every aspect of your day-to-day grad life. My advisor expected me to spend every minute I wasn't in class or in office hours from 9 to 5 in the lab doing research. I got yelled at for showing up at 11 on Tuesdays and Thursdays even though I had a class from 9 to 11. However, I had friends who saw their advisor once every couple of weeks for a status update and that was it. Your advisor is basically your boss and (depending on the school) their power can basically go unchecked. Grad school is not like a traditional work environment. As scary as it sounds, you don't have the same rights as a normal 9 to 5 worker does because you can't just quit. You live with the fear that if you quit, you lose everything you've worked for up until that point. I did not get along with my advisor (more of the story here) so I was forced to power through and finish as quickly as possible. Here are my tips for choosing an advisor:
• The ones who already have tenure are much more laid back. 
• Read reviews for their classes. Often, most professors have the same attitudes about their classes as they do about their labs. 
• Understand their research environment. What's the break down of their lab look like? What type of degrees are their grad students going for? How far along are they? How would you fit into the hierarchy of the lab?
• Talk to their grad students. Do they seem happy? Stressed? Do they have lives outside the lab? Are they required to get papers published every semester?
• If you have grant money, you can basically do whatever you want. Now, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but not by much. Grant money is basically scholarship money with the contingency that research will be done with it, most of the time, a specific project that earned the grant money. For most people in STEM degrees, the holy grail is the NSF grant. You propose a project and if chosen, you can end up with funding for your entire degree. Courses, living expenses, everything. What this really means: you get to choose your advisor, not the other way around. The biggest hurdle for professors is coming up with the grant money for research. However, if you have your own grant money, you just need to find an advisor who is working on something similar to your project and ask to work with them. It's a win-win for everyone. It's probably the best way to alleviate the stress of your entire degree being in your advisor's hands because it's your money. If you really needed to, you could change advisors, or even schools, and still be okay. Here's a link for the NSF program.
• Grad school is much more stressful than undergrad because it can be your entire life. There's no escaping it. Assuming you are doing some sort of research and aren't a trust-fund baby, it's your job, too. You go to class. You have office hours. You do research. You do homework. You hang out with fellow students. You go to conferences. You write papers. There is no limit to the amount of time and energy it consumes. It's not like undergrad with a nice little to-do list of assignments and when it's complete, you get to go enjoy your life. It's more complex and messy so it's nearly impossible to turn off. Some people embrace that all-encompassing feeling, but it just burned me out. I can't be 'on' all the time. If I don't get recharge time, I simply can't give something 100%.
• The last degree you get is the most important one, so if you didn't into your dream school for your master's, you can try again for your PhD. It's not common, but it's not unheard of, either. Part of the reason I chose my college was a compromise: I would get my master's degree while my boyfriend (now husband) got two years of experience at his job and he would follow me to a different school for my PhD. It was 2009 and the recession was at its peak, so jobs were hard to find. Since he'd had a job lined up since October of the previous year, it made sense to stay and give him time to hunt for a job near whatever school I chose for my PhD. And we would have stuck to that plan if I hadn't burned myself out in my master's program. I guess my point is this: it's not the end of the world if you end up in a master's program that you are not thrilled about. Your master's program doesn't have to be your PhD program. However, it is important to know that it is much harder to get chosen by a professor if they know that you just want to get a master's. Most professors don't want to waste their time with someone they would work with for two years compared to five. I'm not saying you should lie or omit these details, I'm just saying I know a lot of people who did.

Lastly, this is more of advice than a tip, but if you are considering going the grad school route, find resources and educate yourself. In hindsight, my high school really prepared me for my college application and enrollment experience. I cannot say the same thing about my undergrad preparing me for grad school. The best resource I had was my parents, but their experiences were from the 70's so it was a whole different bag of cats. Talk to your older friends, talk to your undergrad advisor, talk to your teaching assistants since they are most likely grad students themselves, talk to professors about what they look for in potential advisees.

This sounds really depressing, but my biggest 'what if's' revolve around the mistakes I made in applying and choosing a grad school program. It doesn't have to happen to you, too.

Black Widow Cosplay

When the Avengers sequel premiered at the beginning of the month, the pub trivia I frequent had a special Marvel themed quiz. I'd done a themed quiz before, for Community, and Dan and I did incredibly poorly. However, I've got some friends who are huuuuuge Marvel fans and they talked us into joining their team.

Usually part of these themed quizzes is a costume contest and this one was no different. It was kind of a last minute decision to dress up, but I became inspired to be Black Widow.

For me, the costume was pretty straight forward. Black tight shirt, black tight pants, my Mara Jade harnesses, a black leather jacket, and some curly red hair.

For being kind of thrown together, I was really proud of my costume. I put a lot of time and effort into my hair and make up for the "effortless yet requires a crap-ton of effort" look.

And it totally paid off! I won third prize in the costume contest! It helps when you have Dan yelling in the audience and the winners are determined by crowd volume. I walked away with a pen sketch of the Avengers by a local artist and an Iron Man comic book. My friend Jeremy should have won with his Winter Soldier costume, but he took home second and a Punisher painting.

Image Source

Image Source

Image Source

While our team had the best costumes, we didn't do well at the trivia contest itself. A respectable seventh place. The questions just covered way more material than they told us to study. It was still a great night, though. We assembled well.

The Ten Rules of Having Your Friends Help You Move

Yes, this post comes a little of you left-field. Recently I left a comment on Jessica's The Lovely Side website and she rolled it into a whole post. I personally haven't moved in a while, but I have racked up a lot of experience with it in the last few years.

Since I'm in my late twenties (that hurt me to type), I've helped my friends move quite a few times now. It's like weddings, every couple of months, a friend promises pizza and beer in exchange for moving their stuff across town. We all do it. We're too cheap for movers and you can't say no to friends.

I haven't moved in over three years now, but here's a lovely picture of me from that day. It was August in Arizona. I got an asymmetrical sunburn from how the boxes pulled my shirt neckline down. It was a terribly hot and long day, but it would have been much worse if I hadn't coerced all my friends to help.

In the years since, I've returned the favor numerous times. Just like weddings, there are good moves and bad moves. Here are the ten rules of having your friends help you move so that they will still be your friends by the end of the day.

1. HAVE YOUR STUFF PACKED UP BEFORE YOUR FRIENDS SHOW UP. This is first and in all caps because it has happened to me waaaay too often.  Your friends don't want to help you pack or clean, they just want to move boxes in and out of vehicles. Don't be that guy.
2. Clearly label on boxes and furniture what room you want it put in. On a sofa, it can be as simple as a piece of painter's tape with 'LIVING ROOM' written on it in marker. The less people have to ask you questions, the faster everything will go. 
3. Have a truck/trailer/moving van ready. Again, this should be pretty much common sense, but don't try to make all your furniture fit in people's cars. 
4. On that same note, have a spatially aware person in charge of fitting all the furniture and boxes together. Having to unpack and repack a moving truck because the mattress doesn't fit is miserable. designate a person to tetris everything into place to keep people from just throwing boxes in the back of the truck. The more stuff you can fit in each vehicle should minimize the amount of trips you'll need to take. 
5. Pack boxes with breakables and fragile items you couldn't stand to lose in your own car. Don't put that pressure on your friends. Let them take big bags of clothes and boardgames and books and anything else that they probably won't damage. 
6. Give a piece of paper to everyone with the address of the new place. Asking people just to follow you is not OK. They should have the address, general direction on how to get there, and maybe a description of what the house looks like. Helping a friend move, he transposed two of the numbers in the address, wanted us all to follow him, proceeded to pull over for things falling off the back of the trailer, and lost most of us. I refuse to speed through a yellow light in a crammed car full of your belongings.
7. Have food ready and waiting at the new place. When we moved, I sent my sister ahead to pick up pizzas and sodas. That meal midway through should give you a good second wind to unload everything. Trading food for moving doesn't count if it's some future promise of food another day.
8. Just like weddings, you get one, maybe two, moves tops our of your friends before they refuse to help you anymore. I have a friend who moves roughly once a year. Once his lease is up, he's sick of his place and he's out. If you choose to move that often, calculate the cost of movers into your budget because your friends are over it. 
9. Make sure the utilities are turned on at the new place. When I moved into my first apartment, my roommate hadn't gotten the electricity turned on yet, which she did not tell me until I had arrived at the apartment with all of my stuff. She thought I was being whiny because there wouldn't be AC. I was upset because I didn't want to move in in the dark. We had roughly 30 minutes to unload four vehicles before night fall. Then, I had to dig through all the boxes to make an overnight bag to stay at Dan's place. There needs to be electricity, water, and working heat/cooling. Also, toilet paper.
10. Try to make it fun. Play some music. Dance around. Jump in the pool for an impromptu pool party at the end of the day. It will be a long day, but it can be a great memory with your friends if you smile through it.

Moving is so incredibly stressful, just make sure to follow these rules so that you aren't stressing everyone else out as well.

How to Stock a S'mores Party

Over the weekend, we had our annual pool party. Yes, I know it is technically already Fall, but since the pool was still 80+ degrees, no one cares.

In addition to the traditional swimming and barbeque, this year I made a S'mores bar. Here's what you need to build your own s'mores bar:

Graham Crackers:

• Regular graham crackers
• Chocolate graham crackers
• Cookies (I accidentally bought some soft baked ones. They didn't hold up well for s'mores. Pick drier, harder cookies.)

Marshmallows:

• Plain marshmallows
• Flavored marshmallows (Chocolate brownie were tasty)
• Peeps! (We didn't end up using Peeps because I couldn't find any. We did have a very spirited debate at the party if the sugar on the outside would burn before the marshmallow inflated.)

Chocolate:

• Hershey bars
• Reese's
• Filled or flavored chocolate squares (these Lindt ones were a bit small, but quite tasty)
• White chocolate
• York peppermint patties
• Dark chocolate

Other fillings

• Fruit, like strawberries and bananas
• Spreads, like peanut butter and nutella

Tools You'll Need

• Long skewers (short, wooden kabob skewers worked, but I really thought my hand would be medium rare by the end of the night.)
• Paper plates (So you don't have to clean up afterward, just into the fire they go!)

Part of the reason we had so many options is because we had so many dietary restrictions. One of my friends can't have chocolate, so she used white chocolate. Another one of my friends can't have dairy, so she used dark chocolate. And a third friend can't have gluten, so he brought some gluten-free cookies.

It was an amazing success. We spent the night gathered around a firepit, debating the best way to toast the marshmallows, and trying so many types of s'mores until we couldn't move.

If you'd like to watch a bit of video one of my friend's filmed of Dan trying to build the fire, it's quite entertaining. Thankfully, he didn't burn down the house. Not bad for his first real fire.

How I Survived the 30 Day Shred

You know what today is? It's Day 31. DAY 31! I officially don't have to work out today!

I survived Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred!

And in all honesty, by the end, it sucked.

Let's start at the beginning. After our vacation to Hawaii, I was feeling kind of gross. For five days, we ate our faces off without a care in the world because, hell, it was vacation. When we returned home, though, the pounds followed.

To kick start getting into shape, I woke up one morning and decided that it was time to do all 30 days of the 30 Day Shred. Ten days on each of the three levels of workouts. In a row with no days off.

The first ten days weren't that bad. Yes, there were times when it was hard to fit in a workout, but I got through. I stuck with it and I started to see progress. By Day 4, I was able to do more push-ups. Granted, still on my knees, but more of them. My stomach and arms felt firmer. My clothes fit the same and the scale didn't change, but I felt better.

Of course, this was only because I kind of liked Level 1. None of the exercises made me want to fly to Los Angeles with the sole intent of slapping Jillian Michaels.

Level 2 was different. I hate Level 2. About 40% of Level 2 is in plank pose. I hate plank pose. But, I was still so motivated from the first ten days that I pressed on. By Day 15, I could stay in plank pose a little bit longer without wanting to cry. It was still not my type of workout, but I pushed through and counted down the days to Level 3.

In the past when I'd done Level 3, it was hard, but it was better than Level 2. There was only one exercise in plank pose so I didn't hate the exercises as they tried to kill me.

However, I had never attempted ten days straight of Level 3. These last nine or so days of Level 3 have been draining. Mentally, I checked out. I know that every night, I need to suck it up, turn on the DVD, and jump around my living room, but my heart wasn't in it. I have just been going through the motions. My level of commitment and effort just wasn't what it was in the beginning.

A big hit also came from the fact that I traveled for work on Days 26 through 29. This is commitment, guys. I took the DVD with me. I did Supermans on a gross hotel room floor. Just going through the motions, but the motions none the less.

On Day 30, I did do everything I could to try my hardest. It's easier when the end is at most minutes away. I was a Natalie, not an Anita, for the first time in Level 3. Embarrassingly, when I finished, I sobbed. My face was wet with tears and sweat, a conflict in temperature as the salty water ran down my face.

I survived. I survived the 30 days. Here's what I learned on my journey:

• Committing to a workout regime for 30 days isn't as challenging as I thought it would be. Right about the time it starts to really wear on you mentally is when change starts to happen physically. You get better and it gets a little easier. It pushes you through the next couple of days and then your on to the next level.
• Finding 20 minutes every day to work out can be incredibly easy. And incredibly challenging. Some days, I'd get home from work and my workout would be the first thing I would do. Some days, I'd do it at 9PM, take a shower, and go to bed. On weekends, I'd do it right before lunch. Those were the easy days. The days before I left for my work trip, I woke up an hour early to work out since I knew I'd be busy all night prepping for my trip. One Friday night, I had a party to attend and an emergency after the party to help with, so I didn't get the chance to work out until very late. I was so exhausted that I thought I was going to sob through my work out. Anyway, point is, if it is important, you stop making excuses and you just do it. 
• It is possible to see results. I don't know if I'd ever committed to a routine enough before to actually see results, but I can do more push-ups now. I can do more squats and lunges. My arms are stronger. 
• It is also possible to work out for 30 days straight and not see results. My clothes aren't falling off of me now. The scale didn't go down. If anything, I think it went up. Probably in a 'muscle weighs more than fat' way, but my body looks the same. Granted, I guess that's not why I chose this goal, but it would have been a nice side effect. {Sidenote: I wasn't following the diet program so that may help you see weight loss if that's your goal.}
• The only way to stick with something as boring and tiring as a workout routine like the 30 Day Shred is to make it enjoyable. Buy workout clothes you actually like to wear. Teach your cat to box with you. Mute the workout and play your own soundtrack. You don't have to hear Jillian mention 'cake walk', and therefore 'cake', yet again. The less you like it, the harder it will be every single day to make it happen.

I am incredibly proud of myself. I was able to stick to a work out routine. That fact alone boggles my mind. It makes me kind of sad, actually. Imagine where I could be if I'd stuck to every routine. At least now I know I can stick with it for 30 days. 

What to Pack for Hawaii

This is my last post on our Hawaii trip, I swear. (I wouldv'e posted it last week but blogger deleted it after it was 99% complete, thanks for that.)

So, without further ado, the definitive list of what you should pack for your Hawaiian trip.

Suit Case

• Clothes and shoes. Unlike most travel, don't plan on wearing the same shirt in multiple outfits without washing it. Between the sweat, sunscreen, and the saltwater, it's nice to have some spare shirts to change into. Bring extra shirts.
• Swimsuits. At least two in case one is still wet from the day before.  
• Water-wicking workout clothes. For hikes and watersports
• PJs.
• Socks.
• Bras.
• Underwear
• Beach bag
• Sun Hat
• Glasses and case
• Waterproof disposable camera for in-the-water activies
• Non-liquid toiletries.
• Make-up remover wipes 
• Hair brush, comb, two pony tail elastics, stretchy head band, and at least ten bobby pins.
• Toothbrush.
• Contact case.
• Hair straightener
• Deodorant.
• Razor
• Make-up brushes and solids, like concealer stick.

Big Purse 

• Beach books
• Cellphone charger
• Camera battery charger
• Earplugs.
• Eye mask, since you will most likely have a red-eye on the flight home.
• Neck pillow
• Scarf
• Paperwork for the plane tickets, hotel reservations, rental car, directions, addresses, phone numbers, etc.
• Water bottle (empty)
• Ipod
• A couple of granola bars in case you end up missing a meal.
• Smaller purse
• Wallet
• Phone
• Camera
• Sunglasses and case
• IB Profen
• Liquids bag
• Toothpaste
• Face Lotion
• Sunscreen
• Liquid make-up
• Contact Solution
• Extra set of contacts

Most importantly, just make sure to pack (or buy when you arrive) the following things for your beach bag:

• Waterproof beach bag
• Sunscreen
• Hair ties and bobby pins
• Towel
• Snacks
• Water bottle
• Cover up, swimsuit, and flip flops (if you aren't already wearing them)
• Hat
• Sunglasses 
• Some ziploc bags (to hold sandy things)

Alright. That's it. I promise. (Until our next trip...)

Tips and Advice for Staying at Turtle Bay Resort

Although we had a great time on our six day stay at Turtle Bay on the North Shore of Oahu (you can read my recaps here, here, and here), it could have been knocked out of the park if I'd know a bunch of little tips. So, I present to you, my giant list of tips for the perfect Hawaiian vacation!

The Resort

• The beach situation at Turtle Bay still boggles my mind. There's the beach everyone goes to, as you can see in the image below on the left. It's where all the lounge chairs live and unfortunately where all the small children live, too. However, just a three minute walk down the shore and it’s gorgeous empty white sand beaches, as you can see in the image below on the right. If you can walk five minutes in either direction along the coast, do it. You don’t have to worry about a wave slamming someone into you or someone walking off with your beach bag. [Sidenote: Turtle bay also has a ‘private’ beach that they will take you to for a fee. It’s the same beach where they teach paddleboard. So if you want to find it, take the class early in your trip and drive your own car back later to cut out the fee. I could point it out on a map, but I don’t feel comfortable doing that.]

Left: Main Beach  Right: Our Beach

• When you check in, the front desk will give you one towel card per person. At kiosks by the beach or by the pool, you exchange these cards for beach towels. You should never carry around a towel card. If you’ve finished with a towel, just exchange your dirty towel for a new one. It will save you from having to walk back to the kiosk next time you want to head to the water.
• Don’t waste your money on fancy coffees at the café in the hotel lobby. Each room comes with a Keurig, some K cups, and paper cups. If you need your coffee fancier, just buy a bottle of creamer (for the price of one cup of coffee) and keep it in the mini-fridge.
• Traffic and driving on Oahu takes some getting used to. Locals have no problem just pulling out into traffic, whether there is a gap to pull into or not. It’s jarring at first, but you’ll be doing it, too by the end of your trip. Also, if you’re in one of the surrounding towns, park and walk. Try to find a nice, big parking lot and leave your car there until you are ready to leave. The towns are small enough that you can just walk everywhere.
• If you are a West Coaster, consider staying on west coast time. There’s not much of a nightlife at the hotel and things are a lot less busy early in the morning. Go to bed early and wake up early to miss the crowds.
• Know what events are going on around the hotel. We almost bought tickets to the fire dance show at the Polynesian Cultural Center for a minimum of $40 a person. Turns out, every Wednesday, the hotel had their own fire dance show, albeit it much smaller, for free. And, since it is much smaller, you can participate and learn some of the dances, too.
• The wooden blinds in the room don’t block out much light. If you are a light sleeper, consider requesting a room with a sunset view, not sunrise.
• If you are having trouble finding something on the Turtle Bay website, try their mobile version. I found it much easier to find times and rates on it than their regular site.

Activities

• If you plan on trying out paddleboarding, don’t sign up for the private class. Just pick a 9AM group class a couple days out that is empty and odds are that no one will sign up with you. Much cheaper.
• When we did the paddleboard class, we worried about where we would put our stuff. So, we didn’t bring anything, which probably led to my insane sunburn. Just know that they bus you in a van to the cove where you paddleboard and you can leave anything you bring along locked up in the van.
• Visiting Pearl Harbor is a long day. We knew there would be a wait, but the internet didn't explain it to us properly. Tickets for the boat to the memorial are free and at assigned times, like the Fast Pass at Disneyland. You pick up the tickets and they tell you to come back at a later time. There are also only a scattering of tickets. We arrived at roughly 10AM and were lucky to get on the second to last boat of the day at 2:30PM. Fortunately, there are a lot of museums and displays to see while waiting for your ticket group.
• If you are visiting Kualoa Ranch, know that you need to take one of the tours to see anything. I was afraid we would be wasting our money on a tour when you could just walk up and see the log from ‘Jurassic Park’. You can't. It's deep in the valley. Although the lodge is nice, you can’t see anything worthwhile without getting on a tour.
• My biggest regret was not bringing a disposable underwater camera or getting a waterproof case for my phone or camera. There were so many great moments I failed to capture because I didn’t want to risk ruining my electronics. Find a way to take pictures in any condition.
• If you are not checking a bag, just plan on buying a big bottle of sunscreen when you land. Don’t try and stuff your liquids bag full of tiny travel tubes.
• Turtle Bay boasts ‘trails’ to local points of interest, like the WWII bunker and the large banyan tree where they filmed ‘Lost’. These walks are nice to take, but be aware the trails not well marked at all and you will get lost several times. Just make sure you have a map and if you get lost, just walk in the general direction and you’ll be fine.
• Shop around for souvenirs. Most places you go will have a souvenir shop and most shops will carry the exact same things. Put some forethought into what you’d like to bring back and hunt it out, like my dashboard hula dancer Lelaini.

• Along the same lines, if you’re hoping to bring back a big bag of sea shells as your souvenir, think again. The only shells we found on any of the beaches we went to were either teeny tiny or fragments.
• The Turtle Bay website claims that you can check out a snorkel from them, which is true. However, only the first hour is free, so that kind of limits you to their busy, popular cove. Every additional hour will cost you $7. If you want to spend time snorkeling, bring your own (Amazon has kits for only $20) and heading to somewhere more scenic. Our paddleboard instructor recommended Sunset Beach, the beach across from the Foodland.

Food

• The biggest way we saved money was by not buying breakfast at the hotel. Their options were the café in the lobby, a la carte at North Shore Kula Grille, or the buffet at North Shore Kula Grille. These will easily set you back $10+ per person every day. Instead, we stocked up on breakfast food at Foodland, the local grocery store. Just a ten minute drive away, we bought a tray of cinnamon rolls, boxes of cereal, and a bottle of juice and kept it in the mini-fridge. A whole tray of cinnamon rolls was $3.99. I don’t think you could get a single cinnamon roll at the café for that amount. We did try the breakfast buffet on our first morning and it was not worth the $24 price tag ($18 for me since I don’t eat breakfast meats).
• Apparently a lot of restaurants close early in the surrounding towns, like 8PM early. Plan accordingly.
• Driving along, you’ll notice a lot of fruit stands on the side of the road. Save your money and just buy the exact same pineapples from the grocery store. They all come from the same Dole plantation in the center of the island, anyway. Go to Foodland, buy a couple of them (and a small knife to cut them up), and enjoy! Those pineapples were some of the best I’ve ever had. And it’s a great room air fresher for the days before you carve into one!
• The famous place for shaved ice on Oahu is Matsumoto Shave Ice in Haleiwa (pronounced hal-eh-EE-va). Because it’s so famous, the line goes around the building and they’re only open until 6PM. An equal drive from the hotel is Wili Wili’s at Kahuku Grill in Kahuku. Just follow in the highway in the opposite direction and follow the signs. Yummy yummy.

• Review of restaurants at the hotel
  • North Shore Kula Grille: the hotel restaurant. It's one of the few places that is open all day long. You can order off the menu or choose the buffet all day long. The food is pretty good and the cost is not ridiculously outlandish. Also, the dining area has an incredible view of the pool and the cove beyond it. 
  • Pa'akai: the fancy restaurant. It boasts local ingredients and decor is quite stylish. However, the food isn't that much greater than North Shore Kula Grille, the cost is more, and the view is worse. It's okay to skip this one.
  • Hang Ten Bar and Grill: the poolside grill. The drinks were good. The fries were good. The veggie burger was the worst veggie burger I've ever eaten in my whole life. No exaggeration. The one thing it really has going for it is the location. You can watch the sunset or the fire dance show or people learn to surf in the waves below.
  • Lei Lei’s Bar and Grill: the golf course restaurant. The food is kind of meh and the views are bad. I guess unless you want to just stare at a golf course. Feel free to pass on this one.
  • Lobby Lounge: the hotel coffee shop. We didn't have anything here. It wasn't worth the high prices.
  • Ola Restaurant: the beach restaurant. Unfortunately we didn't eat here because there wasn't anything I could/wanted to eat on their menu. Oh, the plight of the vegetarian.
  • Surfer, The Bar: the hotel bar. See 'Ola Restaurant' above.
• Review of restaurants we tried in Haleiwa
  • Kua Aina: the burger hole-in-the-wall. This was Dan's favorite place. We went twice and he raved about their grilled fish sandwiches. Their fries are shoestring, which I'm not a fan of, but their avocado sandwich was yummy.
  • Pizza Bob’s: the pizza shop. We had our first meal on the island here and it was delicious. the place was chock full of locals and had great service. Since my dad's name is Bob, his souvenir was one of their t-shirts.
  • Luibueno’s: the Mexican joint. This was some of the best Mexican food we'd both ever had. And that's a BIG compliment coming from people who live less than 90 minutes from the border. Make sure to stop in here.

So, I think that's everything. Hopefully this helped you a bit if you ever think about visiting the islands yourself. It's so totally worth it.