A Girl's Evaluation of an Unconventional Wedding

I still consider myself a newlywed (when does that title run out?) as we just celebrated our six month anniversary this past weekend with a pig out at Fuddruckers (yeah, we're classy). Anyway, before the title of newlywed wears off and people start to get annoyed that I'm STILL talking about my wedding, here's a break down of some of the more unconventional things we did.

• VERY small bridal party: Our bridal consisted of my sister as my maid of honor and my husband's best friend as the best man. 
• Pro: It's super easy to style everyone. My sister's dress didn't need to match anyone else's so the options were endless. We eventually settled on a 1950's silk dress with pink roses and mint-colored leaves. I was actually more worried about the tailoring of her dress than mine because I knew where to find mine again. Also, she could do her hair, make up, shoes, and accessories however she wanted.
• Con: There's a lot less help. My mom stepped up, basically acting as a second bridesmaid, during the planning and execution (I typed evacuation by accident first. That would have been all kinds of bad) portions of the wedding.
• No veil
• Pro: It turned out to be a windy day leading up to the ceremony, but it luckily stopped right before the ceremony. I can't imagine being tangled in it during the wedding and not being annoyed.
• Con: When else in your life do you have an excuse to wear a veil?
• First dances before dinner
• Pro: By having the first dances before dinner, it meant that some of our older guests did not have to stick around after dinner, waiting to see the dances.
• Con: Everyone is just staring at you, hungrily, for what seems like eternity, waiting for the songs to end so they can be served. 
• No bar
• Pro: A bar can run upwards of $1000 pretty easily. Hell if I had that in the budget. Also, and probably more importantly, I don't drink. My husband barely drinks, meaning he likes to sip other people's drinks just to know how they taste. I didn't want to be the only sober one at the wedding, worrying about how drunk everyone else is. (Side note: a couple of months ago, I went to a wedding and the mother of the groom got so sloshed that she accidentally lit her hand on fire during the sparkler exit.)
• Con: Not that many people danced and the night ended fairly early. 
• Sunday wedding in the end of February
• Pro: Because February isn't wedding season in Tucson, we got a discounted rate by shifting the wedding date up from mid-March to the end of February. Also, the rate got slashed even further by choosing a Sunday. We easily saved $4000 by choosing the date we did.
• Con: A LOT of people we invited were not able to attend. Since there are no holidays at the end of February, everyone was working and in school and couldn't escape to Tucson. Some people, like my awesome cousin Christal from Alaska, came for the wedding weekend and actually had to leave before the wedding itself. Of a guestlist of nearly 130 people, only 60 were able to attend. While this saved us quite a bit of money, it's hard not to be hurt by it. Oh, and because it was February, there was a freak snow storm. SNOW STORM! The first one in four years happens on my wedding day. Everyone kept saying that if rain was supposed to be lucky then snow must mean we're going to have a super-awesome marriage or something.

Overall, the wedding had a lot of personal touches that may not have been exactly unconventional, but they were definitely us. One of my favorites being this cake topper. You have no idea how hard it was to find female red hair for a Playmobil person!

Fan of Friday: Week of 8/26/2011

I was playing around in Blogger Design yesterday and, like a total noob, I just figured out what a favicon is. So I searched the internet for the perfect icon to represent me. It's a little hard to see so here's a larger image of it.

BAM! Pink dinosaur talking about love!

Top that! I dare you!

Have a good weekend!

Observations of the Female Engineer

As one of only a handful of women at a fairly large engineering company, it's pretty easy to feel like an outsider. Also, throw in the fact that I'm the only one on my team who's under 30, it can make for a pretty unique work day.

Now that I've been working full-time for almost six months, here's some of my observations.

• My coworkers are very understanding and nice when I make a mistake because they think of me as their little sister/daughter.
• No one takes my ideas or opinions seriously because they think of me as their little sister/daughter.
• Skirts confuse people. Men automatically assume that if a woman wears a skirt, there must be something special going on. Sometimes it's 110 degrees out and I just like a breeze on my legs. 
• Yes, I get dirty, too. A good portion of my work involves repairing broken down robots, most of which covered in a thick layer of grime and dirt. For some reason, my coworkers are amazed when I'm coated up to my wrists in the gunk and have accidentally smudged it on my nose. Do they think that just because I'm a girl that dirt doesn't stick to me?
• They expect me to be upbeat and smiley all the time. For some reason, the older guys think it's ok to tell me to smile if I'm not while strolling in the hallway. Sometimes I'm thinking. Sometimes I'm pissed off. But independent of the reason, just because I'm a young girl to them doesn't mean I need to be all giggles and dimples.
• You almost always get the entire ladies room to yourself.
• It's ok, I have heard cussing before. You can see it in their eyes when they're censoring themselves. What's even worse is when they turn away from me and whisper the word to someone else. 

10 Rules for Not Being an Asshole on the Internet

Yesterday, on a website I frequent, I left a comment on a highly debated article. The comment was about my husband and had some basis of truth, but I mainly posted it for a laugh. A couple minutes later, I refreshed to see if anyone had appreciated it and sure enough, there was a reply. And damn, did it piss me off!

Now, this website is actually fairly civilized when it comes to commenting, not like a lot of websites that just turn into political bashing or trolling, but the responder was apparently on some sort of high horse today and felt like making all the commentors on this post feel like crap. He basically said that if I didn't like my husband's behavior, it's always an option to leave him. I responded in a short comment, calling out his behavior, and he actually apologized (which is definitely an internet rarity) and deleted his original comment. Afterward, though, some other jackass came to his defense and said that if I didn't like his reply, I should just stop commenting and deal with it.

Well jackass, here you go. Here's a list of "10 Rules for Not Being an Asshole on the Internet" to prove that yes, in fact, you are an asshole.

1. Don't troll in a public forum
If you want to say snide, sarcastic, or hurtful things as a comment on someone's Facebook wall, have at it, but I only let that slide because if it's not appreciated, it can be easily deleted. As a response to an article, it may not count as offense and get flagged if you blame the entire economy on Obama, but if you post it on an article about where to find discount school supplies, you are an asshole.

2. Don't "Like" everything on Facebook
This makes you more of an unintentional asshole, but you don't need to like every picture in someone's album. "Like" two or three pictures max and if you really like the album, say that ONLY ONCE in a comment. Take this especially to heart if you are significantly older than the person you are commenting on because it will most likely kill the string behind you since no one wants to post something funny or sarcastic after the nice aunt who commented on every single picture.

3. Don't jack someone's status
Don't switch the topic of discussion. If someone is complaining that they had a hard day, it's an asshole move to say that you had a harder day because you took care of two kids all day. If you want to complain about that, post it on your own wall. Personally, I have no problem deleting someone's comment on facebook if they try to jack my status. Consider that a threat!

4. Don't confuse the internet with real life
I know I only have seven followers and the person who follows my blog the closest is my own mom. This is why I do not have a facebook fan page devoted to my blog. This is why when I comment on someone else's blog, I don't follow it up with a link to a similar post on my own blog. Just because you have twitter and post crappy poetry on your blog, it doesn't mean you're a good blogger and it doesn't mean that anyone else wants to hear about it.

5. Don't confuse someone else's life with your own
This is equivalent to what sports fans do, saying things like, "Our line up sucked this year." If your kid has a big swim meet, let them post about it.

6. Don't automatically post things to your wall
No, I don't care about your horoscope for the day or what you need for Farmville. No one cares and we won't tell you, but we'll secretly hide everything you post.

7. Don't be offended if people don't like your opinion
I know this one sounds counter intuitive given the introduction I gave, but let me clarify. There's a difference because getting upset that someone suggested I leave my husband and someone giving me a "thumbs down" and then demanding an explanation as to why someone disagreed. If someone disagrees with your comment, they should be allowed to click the little icon and move on. You are not entitled to an explanation.

8. Don't correct spelling with a second comment
I don't care if it was your own original comment or someone else's, unless the typo changes the meaning, the extra scrolling needed to skip your correction will just make me a little more stabby.

9. Don't post passive-aggressive drama
Everytime one of my teenage cousins posts something like, "Well, I guess I know who my true friends are," I just want to reply, "You actually have friends?" No one is trying to decode what you're rambling about except other people who ramble as well.

10. Don't be an asshole
Maybe this one should go without saying, but just because the internet is anonymous doesn't mean people don't think you're an asshole. They may not know you, but you are an asshole. Calling someone ugly, fat, or stupid because you disagree with their opinion doesn't say anything about them, only you. Karma is, in fact, online and she will still come for your ass.

Did I miss any?

Oh, and here’s a link to the comment that started it all (look for “justpeachy” down in the comments).

But My Life is Just Too Random!

In the midst of all the packing and planning we've been doing for the big move to our first house this weekend, there was a period of a couple of days when we thought we'd paint before we hauled all our crap over. The realtor had told us that we may be able to move up the closing date. Given that we already had a truck and a group of our friends reserved for the weekend after the original closing, we decided it would be the perfect opportunity to clean the place up and paint.

Ahh, painting. Growing up, my parent's house was all white. Every wall was like a blank canvas to better display my artist mother's work. And it's not that it wasn't nice, it was always bright and airy, but sometimes some paint can really bring a room together or define one room from another.

During these couple of days when we thought we would be able to paint, I amassed a quite large collection of paint samples. The colors I was looking for could best be described as "muted jewel tones", like sage and salmon. I plotted out which colors would be best in each room: a salmon/sunset color in the bedroom, sage in the great room, icy lilac in the dining room, stickynote yellow in the guest room, and a pale sky for the living room.

Well, as you can probably already tell from the language I've been using, we didn't manage to get into the house early. There was a typo in the paperwork that needed to be corrected which set us back to our original time line.

And it's a good thing it did because I have reneged on just about every paint choice I had made (except sage in the great room because that's going to be gorgeous). Dan saw the problem before I did but I brushed it off: even though the paint colors would be lovely in their respective rooms, there wouldn't be any cohesion throughout the house. The tones I picked just didn't go together well.

At first, I refused to admit it, but he is right (See honey? I put it out on the internet that you're right). Each room would have been stand alone, which may have been ok if they were all well divided, but when you've got an open archway between two rooms, they kind of have to go together.

After some trolling through Apartment Therapy, I stumbled upon a comment that broke it down into terms I could understand: pick an object (or two) that you love and define your colors for your ENTIRE house based on those colors. Pick two major colors and two minor colors and try to keep the rest in neutrals.

The two objects I chose for this exercise were my awesome comforter (birds!) and my vintage-inspired lounge.

With these two items, I think these will be my colors (and yes, I used Paint. Paint is awesome!):

I'm still not sold on the forest green as a minor color, but I've got some time to mull it over.

Great. I have colors to base things off of. I can design a house. Well, crap. What about everything I love that doesn't fit in with these colors?

Like my butterfly kite? And my framed Chinese paper opera mask cutouts? And my Andy Warhol "Marilyn Monroe" puzzle poster? And my Zack Morris poster (not my actual poster, but the closest I can find. I'll post a picture of mine once it's hung up)?

How the hell do you incorporate those into a design? Do I just need a room where I put all this stuff and segregate it from the rest of the house? Am I just thinking too "big picture" at this point since I'm basing the feel of the entire house on a comforter that gives shoved off the bed for five months out of the year because it's just too damn hot?

32 Incredible Truths

I stumbled across these the other day on Pinterest. Tell me you don't believe in all of them.

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong (A close second being the look on the other person's face when they know they have you beat.)
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (Sorry Mom.)
4. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I found this link, but I don't buy it.)
6. Was learning cursive really necessary? (This is probably the one I disagree with most. Cursive is AWESOME! It makes whatever I'm writing seem pretty and girly.)
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. (This feeling hits me at 10AM more often than I would like to admit.)
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again. (I'm still trying my damnest to ignore Blue Ray...)
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I didn't make any changes.
14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever. 
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last right, but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving the house looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it. (When I bought all the DVDs of "Friends", so many of the jokes finally made sense.)
22. I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring in the groceries.
23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text. (Or finish my lipstick.)
24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they siad?
26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters! (This is my favorite. thing. ever!)
27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear get dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty and you can wear them forever. (But if you ate Cheetos, do an orange handprint check.)
28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber and dumber every year?
29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers.
31. Sometimes I'll look at my watch three consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
32. Even under ideal conditions, people have trouble locating their cell phone, but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

Deciding a Direction

It's been a while since my last post. Not just because every waking moment seems to be spent wrapping something in newspaper and putting it in a cardboard box in preparation for the big move this weekend. It's mainly due to the fact that I don't know what to post.

I've got writer's block. No, it's worse than that. I've got blogger's block.

Since beginning this blog a couple of months ago, this has been my outlet for saying all the things I normally don't say out loud. I ramble on about the things bugging me, create how-to lists, make celebrity observations, and, in general, just write about whatever is in my head at the moment. I haven't given much thought to what I put out there. It's just been my outlet to get it out.

Well, after two months, apparently I've gotten the majority of the babbling out of my system. But now, I'm addicted to blogging. I love the feeling when inspiration hits me and I can actually articulate it.

So now, now that cleared out most of the rambles and the babbles, I'd like to establish some sort of direction. Some sort of theme. And for this, I looked to some of my favorite blogs for inspiration. After analyzing my favorites, they seem to fall into two categories: ones based on personal stories and ones with a specific focus.

• This Fish: I love reading about Heather's adventures. She has the ability to make the most inane tasks incredibly riveting. My life isn't that interesting and I lack the skills to convince you that it is.
  
• Already Pretty: Sally can make anyone feel like they can dress well. She gives fashion such a positive, healthy spin. I wish I could write half as well about anything as she can about styling and self-image.
  

So, as I see it, I have two options. I can either get a much more interesting life or I can develop an expertise in something. Actually, both would be kind of awesome.

With all the things going on in the next couple of weeks with the house, hopefully things will be more interesting. Also, I will try to focus more on the topics that I've gotten the most positive feedback on: celebrity tidbits and relationship pieces. It's going to be a weird combination.

In a couple of weeks, let's just hope some sort of definition or direction has emerged. Any comments as to how it should develop would be greatly appreciated...

5 Things I Don't Understand

1. Why the "Good Morning America" ticker ALWAYS gets the temperature wrong
Just because I live in Tucson doesn't mean you can say the current temperature is 99 degrees every single morning. It's 7 o'clock in the morning. It's not 99. Nope, even on the hottest days. Just plain wrong. The first time I noticed it, I just chocked it up to being a type, but we're going on three weeks of this people. Come on meteorologists! I'm not even asking you to predict anything! Just look at a thermometer!

2. Drunks
I understand having a social drink or two. I don't understand having so many drinks that you can't remember what happened the next day. I don't understand drinking to the point of vomiting all over yourself. No, no one is more articulate when they're drunk. No, no one is sexier when their drunk.

3. My order of doing eye make up
For some reason, I always apply cover up under my left eye first. Then, when I do eyeliner, it's always the right eye first. Then, afterward, mascara goes on the left eye first. This is my pattern every. single. time. I have no idea why, but it must be done this way.

4. Passive-aggressive statuses on Facebook
What's the appropriate response when someone posts something like, "Sigh, I guess I know who my friends are now"? You know they only want someone to ask what's wrong, but every time they answer with "I don't want to talk about it here". No, you just want attention and sympathy and want someone to call you so you can whine to them. I think your real friends are the people who showed enough restraint not make snarky comments to your desperate initial post.

5. Fast Zombies
What's the point of fast zombies? Why would you want to take away the one vulnerability of them? I guess you could try to outsmart them or take our their legs, but why make them fast in the first place? Ugh, I HATE zombies. I don't know why they bug me, but they definitely bug me the most out of all the horror creatures. I tried watching "The Walking Dead", but after the pilot, I had such bad nightmares, I had to vow not to watch anymore. Anyway, at least with slow zombies, you can run away, get some distance, and then come up with a plan or find a big stick. I do not appreciate you Zombieland, 28 Days Later, and Dawn of the Dead (2004). And besides, George A. Romero, creator of zombies says fast ones aren't possible: weak ankles!

Fan of Friday: Week of 8/12/2011

I have been an internet addict lately. I posted last week about my new lover, Pinterest. While I've only been using it for a couple of weeks, I fell into a routine very quickly. My favorite pins at first were recipes and home projects, but these require a lot of time and effort. I'd have to go to the store, buy a bunch of groceries, spend hours in the kitchen, accidentally burn myself again on a new recipe, and have the rest of the ingredients go bad because I have no other recipes that use them. Or I have to wait a couple more weeks for our move and for my bank account to rebound before I can see how the bathroom floor looks tiled with pennies.

It became that the thing I looked forward to most were the outfit ideas people were posting. It started slowly but I started pinning two or three a day. It wasn't that I was using them as an inspiration to shop, I was using them as an inspiration to dissect my wardrobe. Why did the outfits I pinned speak to me? What pieces did I love the most?

After some dissection, the pieces started to fall together. I don't like brown. I don't, but most of the outfits I pinned have brown boots or belts. Also, most of the outfits were all basic pieces. Simple patterns, like stripes, if any pattern at all while the accessories shined. My wardrobe is bursting with patterns. Florals, polka dots, I've even got a shirt with tiny robots on it, but all my accessories have been very simple. Stud earrings, pendant necklaces, sets of bangles.

I started plotting all the shopping I would do to overhaul my wardorbe so that it more mimicked the outfits I was admiring. But then, things got more interesting. I examined the images I had pinned and they all looked very similar. It turns out, they were all from the same site.

This site is Polyvore.com. Oh. My. God. I love Polyvore. It lets you create virtual outfits. You can pull almost any piece from any website, create your own virtual closet of sorts, and plan outfits til the cows come home.

Most people create dream outfits using crazy expensive designer pieces. I'm in the process of creating my own closet. I've been scouring their databases, pulling in pieces that closely match my own. It's been quite eye opening. The outfits I wear the most look terrible in Polyvore. They're monochromatic and unflattering.

So now, I've begun plotting my outfits the night before using Polyvore. And I think my husband and my coworkers would agree, I've looked a lot better this week. This is what I'm wearing today (see below. I had it inserted but it screwed up the layout).

See? Look how professional? Granted my flats also have birds embroidered on them, but close enough, right?

So, if you're in a clothing rut, check out Polyvore. If anything, it'll let you play with looks you hadn't thought of before. Much faster than trying on everything in your closet.

Or just use it to create your dream closet. Ahhh, Louboutins...

A Good Use of a Flash Mob

Would someone please hold Ashton Kutcher down and cut his hair? Seriously, what is he thinking?

       Gross Ashton                                  Pretty Ashton

I do not plan on watching the new "Two and a Half Men" until this has changed. I'd appreciate if you'd get on this, Chuck Lorre. 

That is all.

You Don't Mess with the Big Cat

Some days, when the Victoria's Secret models, A-List actresses, and all the other women who have always had less than 10% body fat and will always have 10% body fat start to wear on my self-esteem, I have to tell myself they aren't real. They're not. They're diets and photoshop and make up and shape wear. They're freakish genes and unhealthy habits.

But no matter how many times you tell yourself that, when it's all you see, it starts to feel like reality. That the most beautiful creatures on the planet tip-toe on heels in push-up bras.

So I look outside the glossy magazine images to something that is unedited. Something beautiful and real: the animal kingdom. My personal inspiration being the Siberian tiger.

Have you ever seen a tiger run? Watched the muscles in its legs ripple with each leap? No one looks at a tiger and thinks, Maybe she should cut back on the wild boars. It's really starting to show in her thighs...

A tiger's body is built for a purpose. Every part of it has a function and is a function how it lives. It may not be as svelte as a cheetah, but it wouldn't survive if it was.

A tiger is a powerhouse. A powerhouse that just about every other creature should fear. It's a beautiful, graceful animal that can tear your face off.

I'd much rather be a tiger than a supermodel. Wouldn't you?

That'll be $500, Mr. Dumbass...

Today I read an interesting article on ivillage.com. Apparently, both Alaska and California have now passed laws that hold the parents responsible when their children are failing classes.

The article asks if this is fair. Well, the answer is simple: YES! Duh!

I just flash back to moments in middle school, when the boys who picked on me were the ones who were the same ones failing out. The same ones who were "goth". The ones who you could tell their parents didn't give a crap about them.

These boys shouldn't have been in school with me. They should have been held back for a looooooong time. But teachers keep passing them because they want them gone. They tortured the teachers just as much as they tortured me. But the teachers couldn't change the factor creating these miscreants. They have no authority to punish the parents who should have been making sure their kids were doing their fractions worksheets. These parents use school as free babysitting.

In the grand scheme of things, public school is a relatively new concept. It wasn't until the 1840's that public schools were established in the US. Until that point, only the rich could afford a formal education or any education was religion-based. But the lack of education wasn't a big hindrance since most people didn't need an education because they spent their days farming the fields. But the nation became more industrialized, kids didn't work the fields anymore with their parents because their parents now worked in factories. Somewhere along the line, public school became glorified babysitting.

Now, I am nowhere near being a parent so I have no idea how hard it might be to make sure your kid has their homework done once you're home from a 12 hour shift. But I guess it comes down to priorities and authority to me. The priorities of putting your children first. The priorities to care about what's going on in their lives. And the authority to instigate change when something is happening in their lives that shouldn't be.

I do believe there's a cut-off for holding parents accountable: whenever the child is old enough to legally drop out in that state. Then, the bill should fall on the child. Fine the kid so they can stay in school or they can drop out.

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because my parents cared. They cared enough to make sure my homework was done and to help me when I was stuck. But if a parent can't do that, they should be fined. It's about time that crappy parents started paying for it.

Some people say that there should be some sort of test before you can have children. Maybe this will finally be the punishment for those people who would have failed the test.