Thursday, March 1, 2012

When Bad Decisions Happen to Good People

A couple of weeks ago, two of my friends got engaged. And while I'm happy for them, I can't imagine that this is going to end well.

It's not like there are big, red flags that they're ignoring, but it's the little things. They've been together long enough, at least a couple of years, and they live together, so I guess an engagement is the next logical step. I also know that she's been pushing for a ring. I can't count that as a bad sign, a sign of desperation, because I was incredibly pushy about my ring (but to my defense, who takes a girl ring shopping and then waits 3 months to propose?).

Although they've built a life and are now building a future together, I just feel in my gut that they are going to implode. To my knowledge, they are on the same page about the major things and have a lot in common, those are just the walls of their house. The visible part you can change and compromise if you need to. It's their foundation I don't trust. Their personalities just don't mesh well. They don't complete each other.

I guess that's not fair. One of them does complete the other, but not vice versa and that's what worries me. One day, the one who isn't complete will wake up, be unhappy and not know why, go home the coworker they've been innocently flirting with for weeks, and destroy the formerly complete one.

Here's the thing: what am I supposed to do about it? There nothing I can do about it, right? It's just a feeling, a reading of this couple. My gut is rarely wrong, but that's not enough, is it? It's not enough to make two people question the biggest decision of their lives. If it were their own gut, yes, but it's not my place to interfere. Neither of them are going to come to me asking for advice. I can't subtly hint at taking more time to think this through. I'm on the outside, as it should be.

So now I'm in the awkward of just sitting back and watching the storm roll in.  If it weren't so sad, I could make good money betting on it. Aw, screw it. I'd give it five years, max.

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